Food Group Friends

One of my fond memories of childhood was going to my grandma's house to play games, watch movies, and get away from our house which was pretty boring most of the time.

On movie nights we would go down to the video store and rent, dare I say, a few VHS tapes. 

 *For those of you not familiar with a "VHS tape", it was a large square black rectangular plastic box with a roll of "film" inside on which the "frames" were printed upon. These "VHS tapes" were inserted in a device called a "VCR" which....... ah forget it.

Anyhow, after picking out the tapes (we usually got something kid friendly like Three Stooges or The Little Rascals) we would go back to my grandma's to watch them.

The best part of movie nights were the popcorn and specifically the way my grandma would make it. She had this little popcorn maker that had a dish on the top to melt butter at the same time. I still believe that popcorn maker had a little popcorn faerie in it or a compartment for magic or something. I wasn't fond of popcorn in general, but I was a fan of this popcorn.

Back then, which doesn't seem so long ago but in retrospect is about 15 years ago, things were simpler, which brings me to the present.

I was at the grocery store with my wife and son and I was supposed to be paying attention to the grocery list. However, I always become easily distracted by new food products. 

I walked down the cookie/cracker/juice aisle and saw this seemingly innocent package:

 A few things came to mind as I absorbed the image of this packaging. 


1. Hmm......does it taste like real bacon?
2. Is it made with real bacon? (Does say natural flavors)
3. Why is this so expensive?


Then things got more serious, as I seemed to be sucked into the hypnotizing rays of brown and..... light brown of the package. I started to think things like:


1. Why is the bacon cartoony? Are they targeting kids?
2. Is the bacon in the hug position to get you to feel comfortable with your impending heart pains?
3. Wouldn't the bacon be sad that he is going to be consumed?
4. Is this the future of America?!


I calmed myself down and was about to walk away, when I saw this:

 Bacon is now friends with Cheddar. Or they got married. I mean, it's still bacon pop, but with cheddar, so they would be Mr. and Mrs. Cheddar Bacon Pop?


I had to walk away before this got out of control. Could you imagine if another flavor was added to the mix? How would I explain that to the children?


Bottom line, I ask of you, readers of my blog to please refrain from buying flavored popcorn. It's unnatural and we will keep bacon and cheddar where they belong, out of my popcorn and on my hamburger.